The show goes on

I want to be happy.
I focus on things, or on others,
Friends, strangers;
It entices me more,
Becomes my addiction,
My destiny.
Instead of being happy,
I become sad.

I exercise my freedom,
I feel cherished in
The so-called like-minded company,
In passionate love that leads into
Humdrum tolerance
Or in acquisitions, opulence
Blinded by material success
Perpetually scared to be with me,
I constantly yearn for togetherness.

My own friendship I underestimate
Seduced by others, submerged in things
I am subjugated,
I crave for them as my savior,
It kills me from inside, it devours;
The more I get, the more I want
The more I compare, the more I hate;
This germ of a game is forever reborn,
The curtain never falls, the show goes on.