Been there not done that
Not committing suicide, despite the urge
This article promises to talk about the steps for not committing suicide. Of late, it is a growing phenomenon that has attracted attention and concern from many quarters, including behavioural psychologists. There are countries where people go in groups to destroy themselves. Yet I am surprised at our inability to talk openly about it. Till date, we have to go to a consultant secretly to talk about our issues and concerns.
Yearning to commit suicide is a germ that’s present in every individual in varying degree. I am not an exception. However, I know I will never let the hormones overpower me because I follow certain methods. Let us quickly understand the reasons before getting on with the methods of preventing the urge.
I promise to make it as
interesting as possible.
Reasons
First
let us look at the reasons why beautiful souls across the world and across
ages, castes, status commit suicide. I am fortunate to have most of them!
·
People
who are
o
Not
successful in life
o
Successful,
extremely successful in life
o
Not
beautiful, handsome, sexy
o
Beautiful,
handsome and sexy
o
Rich,
extremely rich
o
Poor,
extremely poor
o
In
debt
o
Not
in debt
o
Not
acceptable by friends / colleagues / peers
o
Completely
or moderately acceptable by friends / colleagues / peers
o
Loners
o
People’s
person
o
Lovers
o
Without
love
o
Fighters
o
The
most timid
o
Intellectuals
o
Not
intellectuals
o
Businessmen
o
Professionals
o
Authors
of books on positive mental attitude
o
Readers
of books on positive mental attitude
o
Dealing
with sudden loss of near and dear ones
o
Yet
to see deaths in their families
o
Sentimental
and sensitive
o
Not
sentimental and sensible
o
Toppers
of colleges / institutions
o
Failures
of colleges / institutions
o
Celebrities
o
The
most ordinary
o
Unhappy
in their married / sex life
o
Happy
in their married / sex life
o
Homosexuals
o
Heterosexuals
o
Bisexuals
o
With
troubled children
o
With
the most obedient children
o
Thrown
out of schools / organizations
o
Most
accepted in schools / organizations
o
The
list goes on…
The
real reason
Interesting,
isn’t it? Does the list tell us that there are no reasons to commit suicide?
Please scroll up and re-read the list until you understood that there are no
reasons to commit suicide. The greatest mistake people look for is the reason,
either in the form of suicidal notes, or in the form of questioning the
unfortunate relatives, friends to understand the reason. Urge to commit suicide
is induced by some hormones [let us not be so knowledgeable as to know which
hormone…just google it] which in turn are triggered from the inability to cope
with our situations. So situations are not the reasons here… it is the
inability to look at situations that causes the urge. Unless we understand the
reason for suicide as physiological rather than emotional, I suggest readers
not to proceed. To simplify with an example from the list, if not being
successful in life is the reason, then there are people who are extremely
successful also commit suicide. So the real reason is the germ that pushes
people away from life. This germ can be controlled and eventually purged from
our system if certain methods are followed. If I tell you the methods people
use to commit suicide, you will be surprised at their creativity. My objective
is not to show the methods of committing suicide, but exactly the opposite, to
show how not to hurt ourselves.
Responsibilities
do not play any role
Right
in front of the dudes who’d just ended their journeys, people start judging.
However, responsibilities do not play any role; whether they are survived by a
child or a family dependent on them, whether they have ailing parents, pregnant
wives, or have left huge debts for their families, or whether insurances cover
suicides has nothing to do with the object ‘urge’ here. It is only the ‘I’ that
matters to us when we commit suicide.
Methods
to pause-postpone-purge the urge
I
will share some of the methods I have adopted not to go destroyed.
1.
Swear
words – when the question is existential, let us not ornament words with
euphemism; so any swear word (especially f*ck you) functions as a very
important tool. Hence it tops the list. Whenever you feel the urge of hurting
yourself, this is the sacred mantra you can use. It will definitely ease you
out. In order to articulate this, you can use all sorts of sign languages, like
your middle finger, your little finger and shout out the mantra. Try this when
you have the urge and see how it helps you.
2.
Self-talk
– this you would have already read in some books. But the mantra I will be
sharing is unique and I trust you will not find it anywhere.
a.
I
am living in this world
b.
My
life is useful
c.
I
am brave
d.
I
am good
e.
I
know it hurts to live, but it will also hurt to leave
f.
I
am at a dead-end, I have nothing to lose, so I am good
g.
True
I wanted to die I will make this truth a lie
h.
Hold
on
i.
Stay
put
j.
I
wanted to die I wanted to die now no more now no more
k.
If
I have reasons to die I have reasons not to cry
l.
I
will live unloved, unwanted, disliked, hated
m.
I
will live like a failure
n.
I
will live like the poor
o.
No
shame, no fame, no character, faulty, guilty, silly, cunning, selfish,
conceited…will not blame will not blame I do not blame…I live just the same
p.
Love,
love, love [continue this with your hands to the sky and take five rounds
clockwise and five anti-clockwise, then drop on the floor]
You would have noticed that all
of these is about I, me, myself…the reasons stated in l,m,n, and o are very
effective, although they are quite contrary. However, the one that is the most
effective is the last one! Try that dudes I love you all because I am you!
3.
Mirroring
– People who are contemplating suicide…guys how do you look…you will see a
somber look on your face. Just before you are going to the railway track, if
you are in your senses, just look at the mirror before going… and say ha, ha, ha
thirty-three times. Repeat three times.
My
tenderest friends, my lovers, I wish you never go there, trust me the world is
far too sexy than you think.
4.
Repeat
actions – again if you are in your senses, keep on repeating simple actions.
For example, switching on and off a light or fan, closing and opening a door or
a window, pulling and pushing a chair or a table, opening and closing a tap to
fill an empty bucket [you must listen to the sound when you do that]
5.
Playing
– instead of buying rat killers or any other poison or sleeping pills, buy a
ball. Go to your room and keep on bouncing the ball and count how many times
you did. Target is 1000 dudes!
6.
Heavy
therapy – there are some dudes who feel very heavy when attacked with the germ.
At the time, put heavier things on you, like some sofa or chair on you…keep it
for some time and you will see the germ leaving your body
7.
Quilt
therapy – cover yourself with lots of quilt and lie on bed for some time..you
can even go off to sleep
8.
Darkroom
therapy – if it is daytime, make it dark, and keep on chanting f*ck you f*ck
you and f*ck you…I don’t know of any mantra for pious people, unless you choose
any self-talk from the list…you could also try saying screw you instead of f*ck
you! Remember, this you can be anybody else…but the most effective you here is
the germ in you that you want to kill, with vigor and skill.
9.
Walk
therapy – this helps. Remember, you are not proving anything to anyone, so walk
at your pace…there is no race.
10.
Cry
therapy – cry, weep, sob, depress yourself as much as you can…and then say I
can’t believe I wanted to die…to die!...to die?....ha ha ha ….do this after you
have cried enough.
11.
Destroy
therapy – depending on what method you have to choose, you can destroy the
method. For instance, take a pillow and hang it….and when it is hanging in front
of you, say f*ck you. If you wanted to take sleeping pills, take some biscuits,
go to the street and feed the dogs those biscuits…the best method is to take
some seeds and feed the birds on the terrace. Coming to jumping from the
terrace…if you have that urge, go to the ground and look at the terrace, and
say the mantra (by this time you know the mantra, don’t you?)
12.
Opposite
therapy – if you have the sense to understand the reason, you will see people
with exactly opposite reason also have committed suicide…if you do not find the
reason mentioned in the list, write your reason, and then write the opposite
reason also. It helps!
13.
Ung
therapy – just at the moment, if you are not at the level of words…you cannot
chant any word….just say unggggggg until you run out of breath, keep on
repeating it a number of times you’ll see what happens. The moment you stop,
the urge comes back….fight it again with unggggg…repeat this and you’ll see it
works like magic!
14.
Feed
the poor therapy – very effective. Buy some bananas and feed the poor
16.
I
am sure you wouldn’t need any anti-suicidal drugs, but if drugs are necessary,
take it with doctor’s consent.
17.
Other
than these, there are many ways like singing, eating, breathing, satsang, yoga,
exercise, reading (anything including p*rno), and so on can help prevent-postpone-purge
the urge of ending life. Methods such as these can shift our paradigm and take
life head on in the way you are…don’t pressurize yourself to change…just be the
way you are…you will win your way through.
No
conclusion
I
am a failure in every sense of the term. If you tried to find out any place or
situation or a role where I haven’t failed, you will only be disappointed!
However, I consider myself successful because I am still there… I know I will
continue to live till my last breath and I will continue to be successful. As failure or successful, as cherished or disliked, as beautiful or not beautiful, we do have our space and place in this world. Let people like us also live.
My
message to all those who are contemplating suicide is:
Please
don’t go away before you went… it is a skill worth trying: Try not to die
If you are not able to find your way, write in to me at supratiksen1@gmail.com and I will help you, not as a consultant, but as a friend who has been there not done that.Cheers!